1. List 5 Major Goals
Break up those categories into smaller, easier to achieve goals. For example, to say “I want to be happy” is a huge emotional goal. How will you get there? What steps will you take to build self esteem, confidence and the strength to take action?
What steps will you take to feel happiness? Write down your goals to set them up for visualization of success. Be active in your healing by telling your subconscious “I am ready to be happy every day.” Encourage healing to come from within.
2. List 5 Positive Affirmations you will read out load every day
Affirmations are a positive current statement of an idea you desire to impress upon your subconscious mind so that eventually it begins to work for you automatically. Even though it sounds strange to say something you want in a manner that says it’s already here, that’s the way it will work for success.
“I, (your name), completely forgive myself for …”
“I am healthy and I am feeling stronger every day.”
“I am grateful for my ability to …”
By writing these personal affirmations and reading them every morning and every night, you are sending out the message to your subconscious and the Universe. The affirmation is your focus and this is what you want. Update the list as frequently as is appropriate.
3. Write down 10 things you love about yourself.
It can be any characteristic that you have now. It can be the simplest things like “I make awesome chicken marsala” to “I’m a good listener.”
By writing a loving list, your focus will change from the cants to the cans.
The focus helps to build self esteem and confidence. And it gives you a written list to go back to whenever you are beating yourself up about something you did or did not do. In order for others to love you and in order to heal, you must love yourself.
4. Write down 15 things/people you are grateful for in your life.
Gratitude is an important healing tool. Everyone, as long as they are breathing, has at least their breath to be thankful for. Food, water, shelter, friends, computers, comfortable shoes, a beautiful comfortable day outside… all things worth celebrating.
If you are ill — be grateful for the health you do have somewhere in your body. If you are facing a difficult time emotionally — be grateful for the things in your life that are stable. Be grateful for past relationships and challenging situations that helped you learn. Feel gratitude for being able to read, to write and to smile. Writing about gratitude is healing.
5. Write to forgive yourself and write to forgive someone else.
Self-forgiveness allows you to love yourself more. Eckhart Tolle talks about the “Power of Now” and if you are reliving something that you did or said, you are living in the past. The past is gone, done and over with, life is really about what you can do now to keep moving forward.
→ Write a letter to yourself to forgive yourself for whatever you are holding on to and feel the emotional load lighten in the process.
→ Write a letter to someone to forgive them. Tell them you will no longer give them control over your feelings. You have moved on, to go forward in your life. Writing a letter of forgiveness to someone who hurt you does not mean you approve, in any way, of what they did. It means you have suffered enough with it and are now willing to part with the negative emotions you have attached to it.
Think about the experiences that led to the need to forgive yourself and others. They made you who you are today, made you stronger, and made you look at things a little differently. You have probably relived and relived situations that caused you pain and have given them more attention than they deserve. Writing a letter is a good way to say “Enough! I am moving forward with my life now.” Mailing the letter is optional.
HEALING does not mean the hurt never happened. It means the harm no longer controls our lives.