How Old is Grandpa?

Submitted by Marv Bloom
Miami, Florida

One evening while a boy was talking with his grandparents about current events, he asked his grandpa what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.
The Grandpa replied, “Well, let me think a minute, I was born before:
television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees, the pill. There were no: credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens.
Man had not yet invented:
pantyhose, air conditioners, dishwashers, clothes dryers, and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air, and man hadn’t yet walked on the moon.
Your Grandmother and I got married first, and then lived together. Every family had a father and a mother.
Until I was 25, I called every man older than me, “Sir.” And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, “Sir.”
We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy.
Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.
We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.
Serving our country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege.
We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.
Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.
Draft dodgers were those who closed front doors as the evening breeze started.
Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends -not purchasing condominiums.
We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CD’s, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.
We listened to Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President’s speeches on our radios.
And I don’t ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.
The term ‘making out’ referred to how you did on your school exam.
Pizza Hut, McDonald’s, and instant coffee were unheard of.
We had 5 &10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.
Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel.
And if you didn’t want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.
You could buy a new Ford Coupe for $600, but who could afford one? Too bad, because gas was11 cents a gallon.
In my day:
Grass was mowed
Coke was a cold drink
Pot was something your mother cooked in
Rock music was your grandmother’s lullaby
Aids were helpers in the Principal’s office
Chip meant a piece of wood
Hardware was found in a hardware store and software wasn’t even a word
We were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby.
No wonder people call us old and confused and say there is a generation gap.
How old do you think I am? I bet you have this OLD man in mind. Well, you are in for a shock!
Read on to see — pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time. Are you ready?????

This person would be only 60 years old, born in 1953

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